“Blast from the Past”

By

Gerry Niskern

Have you ever known a winter this cold in the Valley of the Sun?

Well, sure you’re laughing if you come from Colorado or Minnesota or parts East. Those of us who grew up here are finding it hard to take. Okay, I admit it, we’re a bunch of sissies.

If you grew up in the land of ice and snow, you probably had to wear those hated snowsuits as a kid. You knew they kept you warm because you mother said so.  Do you remember lining up so the poor teacher could help everyone get into their snow pants, boots and get all zipped up nicely before heading outside?

How many of you women as a little girl,  had one of those wool knitted caps that peaked at the top and tied under the chin, with balls on the ends? Do you remember building snowmen; sledding and making ice cream treats with snow, vanilla and sugar? And of course, worst of all, how it feels to get hit hard, right in the mouth with a speeding snowball during a fight.

Don’t even try to find a space heater this year. Everyone’s sold out. The heating and cooling companies are having a bonanza. When those heat pumps work overtime during a stretch of below freezing weather they ice up from overload. Ice forms and the only solution is to turn them completely off for a few hours. The incredulous response to that advice from repairmen is “You’ve got to be kidding!”

When my family moved to Phoenix when I was a kid, we thought we left the cold weather behind. Back then, however, without the Internet, information was not as readily available. My mother gave away all her wool blankets and quilts. She was told that the family wouldn’t need them in sunny Phoenix. Our home like most here had a screen-sleeping porch on the rear. They were set up for the hot months to catch a cool breeze. The porches had canvas flaps that could be let down for winter protection. Mom had to scramble to borrow warm blankets for the first cold night here.

We Phoenicians are used to turning our furnaces off at night. Kids are sent off to school with a light sweater, which they manage to shed or lose by 10 A. M. People are more likely to take a jacket with them here in the summer for the air conditioning at the movies.

After all, Phoenix is the city where the pre-schools truck in a load of snow from up north so the kids can experience the fun of building a snowman. They get to see what snow feels and tastes like and hopefully, not from a well placed snowball to the teeth.

In the meantime, this year our residents have had to scramble to find old towels and sheets to cover frost sensitive plants at night. We had to dig out our heavy coats if we can find them, and gloves for the morning commute.

Don’t be embarrassed if you’re all bundled up like the Abominable Snowman when you pass smug joggers in their skimpy shorts and tiny tee tops. Just remind yourself to wait until they’ve lived here a few years and their blood has thinned out too.

I actually bought a pair of earmuffs for my early morning walk. I love them. What I really want to know is where are those “dreaded ” snow pants when you really need them?