Anything Goes!
By
Gerry Niskern
A good question was posed online the other day. What should the cut off age be for kids trick or treating?
Some say it should be twelve or fourteen; and even then the tricksters should be in costume, in the spirit of the holiday. No one appreciates having the door bell ring at ten o’clock to find a group of teens, not even wearing a mask, holding out pillowcases to be filled.
In West Virginia where I grew up Halloween parties for school age kids in private homes were the order of the day. The most important aspect of the party was to be the last one who’s identity was guessed. Everyone went to great lengths to masquerade, arrive separately from the siblings, anything to fool the party-goers.
Back then, the older teenage boys took the “ trick” part seriously on Halloween. I can remember one late evening when our family arrived home to find all our porch furniture up high in our big oak tree. Another year the older farm boys actually dug up the pieces of cement that formed our walkway to the house. After our lights were out for the evening they proceeded to drop the large chunks onto the front porch. It sounded like a bomb and our little frame house shook violently. On other years they would throw handfuls of dry corn at the windows after dark. “That’s nothing” my mom used to say. “When I was a kid the older boys used to roam the town turning over out-houses!”
So actually, if the teens don’t want to go with the little kids and are not invited to the elaborate adult parties, where does that leave them? Back to a crazy tee shirt and a pillowcase. They better go trick or treating earlier because due to the Pandemic and supply chains interruptions, there is a shortage of candy this year. Candy companies are struggling to meet their customers demands.
I couldn’t even find my favorite, candy corn. Everyone was sold out!

THAT’S NOT SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN

The heavy wind storm and tornado that affected part of Arizona last Monday reminded me of a “tornado that wasn’t” several years ago in Phoenix when the insurance companies insisted that they didn’t happen here.

When you read about all those tornados that hit the south and Midwest every year aren’t you glad we don’t have tornados in the Phoenix area? Tell the truth. Do you think, a little smugly, “Well, we might have horrific heat in the summer, but at least we don’t have tornados?

Actually, one day in the late l970’s, my # 2 son, a teenager, and I were standing at the kitchen window looking out in amazement. We thought we were just having a super size dust storm, but something different was happening. The house was shaking. At around five-thirty the sky had turned an eerie green. Large sections of shingles were swooping by, followed by huge wood structures hurtling past. I remember trying to yell above the roar that sounded like a freight train was bearing down us, “I think we should get in an inside doorway. Something weird is happening!” We headed for the inside pantry.

My husband was on his way home when from the West valley when he heard on the car radio that a funnel cloud was moving toward the central Phoenix area. Breaking all speed limits, he reached our neighborhood in time to see the entire roof of my parent’s house under construction, down below our little mountain, lying on the other side of the street.

He raced up our steps and burst in the door. “Hurry, hurry” he yelled. “Upstairs!”
We ran up behind him and suddenly, we were looking at bare sky. I couldn’t comprehend what I was seeing. I was numb with shock and told myself, “This is not happening. This must be a dream.” We were standing in our bedroom and rain was stinging our faces!

My husband raced back downstairs to go purchase large plastic tarps to stretch across the rooftop. He carried up his extension ladder and climbed up on what was left of the roof and started nailing the cover down. My son was still numb with disbelief when his dad yelled down to him, “get on up on the ladder and grab the ends and nail them down.” He looked at me and yelled, “But, mom, what if the son-of-a bitch comes back?”

The next morning, when assessing the damage, we saw that the funnel cloud had totally lifted the roof structure from my folks house and all the framing inside was swirled like a giant spoon had stirred it. We learned later that the tornado had destroyed a large building on Seven Ave, South of Camelback, swept north and ripped apart the condos on a little mountain right off Twelfth Street and then slammed into our house on top 14th street. It swooped down and destroyed my parent’s construction site and moved on out to Paradise Valley where it uprooted some trees.

Later on, the insurance companies and the weather bureau debated long and hard if it was actually a tornado. Most insurance companies finally reluctantly paid homeowners for damages, still arguing that “the Phoenix area doesn’t have tornados.”