Color moods
By
Gerry Niskern
Have you been to the Dr. lately? Depressing, isn’t it?
I don’t mean your reason for going, of course, I’m referring to the monochromatic colors used in most of the waiting rooms everywhere. The shades of grey on the walls and the grey plank floors are not what you would like to see when you are feeling down, worried or depressed already.
I’m convinced there was a conference of office designers somewhere a few years ago and the outcome was a pledge to use only greys, blacks, a little white in all medical places. And then, of course, the wall décor must be silver or chrome art wall sculptures that have no redeeming features whatsoever.
Of course, when they call you into an examining room, you see that the walls do have some pictures to break the monotony . But wait, when you get closer it turns out to be a giant image of the human reproductive system, or worse, the digestion tract in living color!
For several years I went to a dermatologist who had quilting as a hobby. She was a wonderful doctor who also believed in sharing her beautiful quilts with her patients. They adorned the waiting room and even hung in the exam rooms. (master of tiny stitches!)
I remember actually being introduced to watercolor painting by another doctor who believed that his patients deserved to enjoy something beautiful, colorful and original. I was fascinated by the paintings on his walls. The images were so alive, ethereal and inspiring. They drew me into the painting world and eventually the art profession.
Another Asian dentist had original watercolors installed in every room. Visits to the dentist are never pleasant, but those paintings were unique. They were done by a fellow Asian, well known here in the valley, and a welcome distraction to his many patients.
I confess I don’t know how Pediatrician’s office décor is, I hope there is vibrant color and interesting images everywhere. Phoenix children’s hospital for example, does a fabulous job.
I’ll admit I haven’t accepted the idea of a monochromatic world that seems to be widely accepted everywhere, in our homes, in the miles of grey or tan homes or apartments. I think kids should grow up in homes with color on the walls and interesting art. Landscapes, portraits, and good abstracts can trigger a response that will lead in a thousand directions.
Hopefully, someday this monochromatic trend in décor will fall out of favor and some color will come flooding back to help change and lighten our moods.

How fatherhood has changed
By
Gerry Niskern

I’d like to share this story that has stayed in my memory for many, many years. I was about seven or eight years old at the time.

(John the hired man knocked on our door on a cold night, right after supper. He had a boy by the arm who looked about twelve or so. The boy had on a man’s old suit coat.

“I caught him hiking on the highway. Could you run him back to his folk’s in town?” John asked my dad.

“Sure,” my dad replied. “Put him in my car while we get our coats.” My sister and I said “hi” to no response, as we climbed into the back with the silent boy who sat rigid looking straight ahead. I was shocked to see a crust of bread lying on the car floor under his feet. Lena, John’s wife, must have given it to him, I thought.

I stole a glance at the boy. He had unshed tears in his eyes as my dad drove the five miles of steep winding road back down into town. “What’s your address, son?” my dad asked him a couple of times but received no reply.

Finally, as we reached the edge of town, he told dad where to turn. We stopped in front of a soot covered old house and dad took him to the front door. The porch lights came on and the door opened. A man spoke with my dad for a minute.

I got on my knees and watched out the rear car window as the boy, shoulders bent, shuffled slowly into the house as we drove away.)

I remember feeling sorry for the boy and asking why we had to take him back. My dad replied, “Because it’s against the law for kids to run away from home.”

Of course, no one knows why that boy wanted to get away from home back then. but we do know that times have changed. Parenting has changed. And the way fathers “ parent” in today’s society has changed most of all.

Father’s are no longer the traditional disciplinarian. Since dual income households has greatly increased, dads have nearly tripled the time spend with their children since the l960’s. If you were raised in the 50’s, you probably can’t help but compare the huge change in dad’s today. They spend more time talking to their kids, encouraging them, and really listening.

Some will always be better in the role of dad then others. I can’t help but think of the men in my family and how they differed. Some dad’s were there emotionally for the kids and some weren’t. Some were better teachers, of anything, than others. Some were good with babies and toddlers, but not so much with older off spring. Some taught with words,, others by example. If dad treated people with respect the kids learned respect. If dad was honest, the kids learned to be honest. Most fathers tend to follow the lead of their fathers, but with improvements too.

Those kids from the 50’s are watching their son’s become better dads than they were and their son’s will do the same.

Every family is Unique

By

Gerry Niskern

Are you going to a family reunion this summer? Reunions mean only one thing: GROUP PHOTOS. We all treasure that old family photo of the entire clan together. We can identify aunts, uncles and cousins by their common family features, but mostly, we know them by the way they dressed.
I saw an ancient family photo at a friend’s house the other day. Some of the girls had huge bows on the back of their heads. That set the time and date and brought a lump to my throat. You see, the only picture I have of my mother as a little girl shows her wearing a dress two sizes too large (in the hand- me- down era) and sporting a oversize bow in her hair (circa 1918).
Invariably we enjoy identifying individuals by their unique style as we turn the pages of old albums and that reminds us of a great story we’ve heard about that person.
Something changed on the way to the family reunions now days. Who decreed that everyone appear exactly alike now?
With many family reunions planned this summer, there will be one individual determined to produce a cookie- cutter group picture. No doubt she will have sent out newsletters six months in advance with the strict instructions. “Everyone, men, women and children are to wear a white shirt for the family photo. And, everyone must wear tan slacks. No Exceptions” If she is extra efficient, she will bring along a few shirts and pants for any slackers.
Think about it. What’s the worst that could happen if the “photo Nazi” just relaxed a bit and let each family member show up in what they always wear?
Is the point of reunion pictures to have a rigid, boring photo of an army of relatives faces in a sea of red, yellow or blue tee shirts or an interesting group photo celebrating the different personalities in the family?
It would be much more fun many years from now when future generations are looking at a family photo taken in 2023 if they will see teenage girls in low rise jeans, a few chubby ones with their “love muffins” showing. The boys could be in their baggy shorts. The twenty or thirty- something gals (the lines are a little blurred these days) would be sporting tube- tops and obviously a lot of new boob jobs too. The guys who work out would be showing off in muscle shirts.
They’ll remember that uncle who always had his Blue Tooth growing out of his ear; he might miss a money making deal!
There’s that aunt still wearing her bouffant hair and grandpa in his signature overalls. And there’s the cousin who joined the commune in her Hippie days, in her long braids, and granny dress.
Years from now, you will be glad everyone dressed as their personality dictated.
Viva la differences!