They Carried
By
Gerry Niskern
When our family moved to Phoenix in 1942, we stayed in an auto court on West Van Buren while searching for a house. Mom sent my sister and me to the little Chinese grocery down the street every day to buy some items for dinner. The two teenage sons waited on us and what I remember most was how the young guys joked with us. They kept us entertained in our new town. The crackling of the paper bags blended in with our giggles as they sacked up our groceries.
Actually we soon learned that there were several Chinese grocery stores in little neighborhoods in Phoenix. They employed local kids for deliveries, sweeping and stocking. My husband worked for one down on West Lincoln and 19th Avenue. Turned out, my new best friend’s dad owned one of those grocery stores. Their’s was on West Madison and the family lived in the back.
Immigrants to this country have always found that starting a little grocery was a way to start earning a living. My mother used to tell about the Greek man, Mr.Darwishe, who came to town with a sack on his back selling small house hold items to the homemakers. Later on he had a good size grocery on the main street in town. As a child, my mother was sent to the store often. My grandmother refused to buy anything from the “Company Store”, with their bug infested food items, even though Grandpa’s pay was part vouchers for the company store.
When she was only six or seven years old, my mom would gather her items on the counter, climb up a ladder and take down the small receipt book with her family’s name and write down everything she was taking. Mr. Darwishe trusted her completely. Then when payday rolled around on Saturday her dad would go in and settle up with Darwishe.
Every year during the strike (the coal miners “went out” every year) Mr. Darwishe “carried “them, sometimes for three or four months. This was common practice in all the different ethnic grocery stores during those years around this country.
Years later, I remember as a new bride complaining when my young husband swung by Henry’s Chinese store to pick up some items. I wanted to do all our shopping at the big Safeway supermarket. Bult my spouse carefully explained, “Henry “carried” my folks when we first came to Phoenix and once during the Building strike. That’s why we should always come by Henry’s to pick up a few things.”
With the major strikes taking place right now in our country, I’m reminded of those many small grocers of all nationalities of years past. When asked, they almost always answered, “Yes, we carry.”

How Great is That?
By
Gerry Niskern
I sensed someone was watching me as I slept. I opened my eyes to see an excited little face peering down at me. “Hey Grandma Gerry, do you remember that game?” It was 5 A.M! My three-year-old grandson was referring to the game I had introduced him to the night before. Hi Ho Cherries. I think it’s safe to say that was the beginning of the long tradition of playing board games in our family.
I watched the adults play lots of card games when I was a kid, but I was introduced to my first board game, Monopoly, when I was around eight. It belonged to a friend. I loved it. My sister and I asked for that game for Christmas many times. It is still the most popular board game “world wide”. Years later, my youngest grandson loved it too, but I’m sorry to say that if he didn’t get to buy Boardwalk, the board, dice, markers and properties were launched into space!
As time went by we added many other games like Taboo, Scrabble, Gestures, etc. If our kids, grandkids or eventually great-grandkids brought a friend on a holiday and they liked to play games, that was good. We had a lively game called “spoons” and if a new girlfriend lost a fingernail and continued to play, well, she was a “keeper.”
Games were always a wonderful way for family members of all ages to connect. Ages eight to eighty sharpened their social skills and learned to get along together. Games lost favor for a long time, although not with our family. Everyone played on birthday celebrations, and every holiday. Then in the l990’s board games were discovered and became popular with the public again.
Of course, as our family grew and changed, new games were added, but games became less frequent. Covid was a major roadblock for get togethers but I still looked forward to a game or two on the big holidays.
A few weeks ago my great-granddaughter called. “Hey Grandma, we’d like to come over some Sunday and have a game day with you.” She and her older brother, (the off spring of the munchkin who woke me up to play Cherry-O’s all those years ago) and their significant others came over and we played game after game after game.
Those twenty-somethings included a part time Plastic Surgeon Tech, part time ambulance driver currently sending out applications to Med school, a Landscaper, an office administrator and a Physical Therapy student. They want to do it again soon.
How great is that?

“The Face of Labor has Changed”

By

Gerry Niskern

This previous column bears repeating!

Did you have any help preparing for the coming holiday that celebrates the working people in America? You probably had a lot more help from unseen workers than you realize. We all tend to take other peoples labor for granted, just like we take our country’s holidays for granted.
Our country’s unique national holiday came about because back in the late 1880’s around 10,000 workers in the garment industry walked off the job and staged a notorious strike in New York City. They demanded that common laborers in the United States have a day of recognition for their efforts.
Look around this Labor Day. Do you notice anything different? There is a lot of white hair out there. A fast growing number of the unseen workers are seniors. These older workers show up everyday, sometimes regardless of poor health. They see what needs done and they do it.
The people who hire seniors can’t say enough good things about them. They know they’re on time, with no call-in excuses of “the car broke down or the sitter didn’t show up.”

Do you know any of these people personally? Probably not, since they just melt into the blur of people who serve your needs as quickly as possible and get you on your way. When you do spot a senior on the job, remember that they are probably someone’s mom or dad, grandma or grandpa.
Most seniors didn’t expect to be working in what has always been described as their “golden years”. They’re working for various reasons. Many just plain need the extra income. Social Security doesn’t go far in this day and age. Others are stranded with no pension from life long jobs. Some were just unskilled or unlucky. As one fellow said to me, “By the time you can make ends meet, they’ve moved the ends!”
I recently attended a swim suit sale at one of our large department stores. The snowy hair on the sales lady was getting whiter by the minute as she tried to take care of the whole department by herself. When I overheard her say, “I’m getting too old for this!” I inquired about her age. She was 88.
Another friend of mine, retired from the phone company a few years ago and is now a hostess at one of our local restaurants. “I ‘m working part time now in order to have money for traveling.
She went on to say, “I find that I have more patience because of my life experiences. In the restaurant business, you have to learn to not take things personally. You’re there to serve the public”
An older friend retired from a large company and drives a van for the guests at a resort. He gets along with the young guys just fine. That is, after he let them know they were not to refer to him as “the old man.”
Several Seniors mentioned the fact that they were better able to relate to their grandkids because of working with the younger set.
I knew a distinguished gentleman by the name of Sam who was a Utility Person at AJ’s Preveyor of Fine Foods in Central Phoenix. He was 77. Sam raised ten children, had nineteen grandchildren and five greats. He’s retired from forty years with the U.S. Post Office; he always said, “I’m a people person and I love this job.”
Every year when I asked him if he would be there on Labor Day, he answered cheerfully, “If it’s on Monday, I’ll be right here.”

Welcome Home!
By
Gerry Niskern
What is home? Home might be where you grew up. It might be a friendly neighborhood or a familiar town. It’s a place where you are never alone; where you know someone is right beside you all the time.
More importantly home is a place where you find help, companionship, and laughter; where you can feel safe, relaxed and comfortable.
I attended a welcome home/ birthday celebration the other evening. My great-grandson was home after seven years studying to become an Internal Medicine Specialist. His parents, brothers, sisters, grandparents, great-grandparents, cousins, nephews and friends met at a local Pizza place to welcome him home and sing him Happy Birthday too !
There were warm hugs and kisses of greetings all evening thru the loud music and shouts of kids. This young doctor was a little taller and at least twenty pounds heavier. He also had the quiet confidence that came with his years of intensive training with people from all walks of life.
He huddled with grandmothers who wanted to know when he was going to quit shaving his head. (Answer, never.) One wanted know what kind of car he was going to get now that his 2006 was gasping its last breath? Girl friend of brother wanted pointers on how he made his sourdough bread which he perfected all thru medical training. (at a luncheon with silly awards fellow grads voted him “the one most likely to bake you a loaf of bread as an apology for hacking your computer”!)
He was locked in serious conversation with little sister who is following in his footsteps and is currently sending out applications to Med schools.
When his cake came out and we all joined in singing happy birthday, there were a few tears. He had been alone on seven birthdays, but wasn’t anymore.
Everyone wanted to know why his little daughter wasn’t there. (answer: She is in Kindergarten in another town.) That brings us to the theme of today’s blog. You see, she was born after he started his long journey. As a divorced dad he has had limited contact and wants to make up for lost time.
He is now home to Arizona with a position in an Arizona hospital. He wants to create a second home, a “daddy home” for his little girl. He wants to spend special days reading, coloring, playing games, teaching her skills. This dad will take her on lots of hikes, grocery shopping, cooking, and discussing whatever comes their way.
In other words, our guy enjoyed the warmth of family’s arms the other night and he wants his child to be able to count on the peace, joy, and love where she knows she is always welcome in her “daddy home”.
I wouldn’t be surprised if she isn’t learning to put a little loaf of sour dough to rise this weekend!

Pulchritudinous Barbie
By
Gerry Niskern
Pulchritudinous, (a person of breathtaking, heartwarming beauty)
That’s how the little girls who received first Barbies felt. Here was a beautiful doll that they could dress up like a grownup and their dreams had no bounds with Barbie. Their mothers liked Barbie, and grandma’s loved her too. Who do you think was buying all those cute outfits?
Evidently those first edition Barbies are very rare. The collectors will pay up to $ 27,000 for Barbie in “pristine” condition. A doll in “played with” condition will even bring up to $ 8,000.
The first Barbie that lived in our home didn’t stand a chance. My daughter received her for Christmas in l959 when she was seven. The iconic fashion doll had a black and white striped bathing suit, long blonde hair caught in a pony tail and of course, high heels. She had some outfits, but the best was the red satin lined fur coat that a loving aunt sewed for her. She also crocheted Barbie a red bathing suit and a sweater to wear with a red quilted circular skirt.
Then, one day, disaster struck! While she was at school, her little brother, a precocious, almost three-year-old decided he would paint Babbie’s finger nails. He explained it this way, “ I got a little bit on her hand, so I painted her hand. Then I got a little bit on her arm so I painted her arm, but I got a little bit on her neck, so I painted everywhere and then I got a little on her face, so……….”
Trouble was, when I used nail polish to remove the bright red paint from my distraught daughter’s doll, it removed all her original painted on facial features. She was a bland albino. Sister got a new Barbie, this time a redhead with a bubble hair style. Creative little brother suffered garnishment of his weekly allowance until new Barbie was paid for. His weekly trip to 7-Eleven for candy was profoundly missed.
Looking back decades ago, I remember playing paper dolls with a character I cut out of the Sunday comics every week who was an early Barbie type. Her name was Fritz Ritz and she had cute figure and high fashion clothes too. I drew and colored a new wardrobe for her every week. Ruth Handler, the inventor of Barbie said she got the idea for Barbie while watching her daughter play with paper dolls. She designed Barbie along the lines of a popular risqué German fashion doll.
Women who are grandmothers, and even some great-grandmothers today, were the first little girls to love Barbie. But if you remember, a lot of the little boys liked to play with her too. A friend told me about buying her little nephew a Barbie when he was around four and had begged for the doll. He had lots of outfits for Barbie and kept all her matching little heels in a plastic Ziploc bag. He insisted that she have a new outfit for Thanksgiving that year. She also remembers several months later seeing Barbie hanging by one leg from the ceiling fan, totally naked. That was the last time she saw her.
My daughter enjoyed her Barbies for many years and then one day when she was around thirteen she walked in with the bag full of dolls and clothes and said, “Here, throw these away.” I took them and just put them quietly away for safe keeping. I offered them to her later after she was married. She was glad to get them, but her creative, youngest son, around four or five was really happy. He loved playing with his mom’s Barbies.
But the problem was that when his best friend came to the door, (like a lot of little boys who loved Barbie,) he had to quickly shove all of the Barbies under his bed!

“Rolling On”
by
Gerry Niskern

School’s starting everywhere and it couldn’t start without the bus drivers. Some are new at the job this year, and some are old timers. Here is the experience of just one.
‘I wrote this little story as suggested to me by my younger brother-in-law. He had worked at Cox Toys as a model train designer and later at the Centura Rocket company designing rockets. He started driving after he retired.’

Keith crushed the pink slip of paper in his fist as he strode from the office. His heart was pounding. The numbers on the driver’s lockers were a blur. He yanked the metal door open and started throwing his personal things into a box.
“What kind of a joke is that? Saying I can’t drive my bus anymore. I don’t care what their new rules say about age limits; after years of hauling kids!”
He sat down abruptly and took a few deep breaths. He remembered his blood pressure and told himself to calm down.
“You have the blood pressure under control and passed the physical one more year, don’t blow it now.”
After a few minutes, he picked up his compass and studied it. He chuckled as he remembered the first morning he drove the huge yellow vehicle. “Man, was I nervous…afraid I’d forget the route, get myself lost, or leave some kid stranded. I was scared that I couldn’t make friends with the children. He tossed the compass into the box and pulled out a sweat stained cap. “I remember I was drenched in nervous sweat when I finally stopped for that last pickup that day.”
A little girl was clinging to her mother when he pulled up. The first grader climbed the high steps, one at a time, sniffling and blinking back the tears. She said something to him; he couldn’t hear her at first. He leaned down to hear her timid voice. “Hi, Bus.”All the first day’s tension disappeared with his laughter.
He pulled his gloves from the locker shelf and thought back to the first winter of driving…November, December when the snow came. He used to stand on the bumper in the pre dawn darkness scraping thick frost from the windshield as icicles formed on his mustache.
He prayed on those icy mornings as he made his way slowly from one huddled group to another, white curls of breath disappearing above their heads as they scrambled aboard.
He learned how to spot the troublemakers fast. When he wrote up a student and they lost their riding privileges for a week, he knew which driver of the nearest route to notify, so the culprit couldn’t sneak on with another crowd.
Keith chuckled when he thought how he had gotten so he could predict the day, usually at the end of the first week, when five or six kids would jump out the back emergency exit. He would be standing there ready to herd them back on the bus.
Sure, times had changed a lot over the years. Kids had changed. First, the district installed the surveillance cameras, then came the CB radio. “Code Red” to the office meant he was pulling off the road, doors locked, send the police. He sighed, tossing his first aid kit into the box. There was one time he wasn’t likely to forget.
One day he wrote up an eight year old boy, an automatic “no ride” for a week. The next morning, at the boy’s stop, a massive body hurled through the bus door towards him. Hands of steel dragged him down to the ground. A large woman pounded him while small feet kicked him in the head.
He drove the next day , taped ribs and all. He wouldn’t let the vice of fear gripping his stomach show as he joked with the kids at the young kickers stop.
So it went…Now he had reached “that age” and been relegated to a van, a mini van at that! He’d be picking up pre-schoolers for a special education program. Forget it…not for him! He made a vow to himself, “I’ll stay one week, one week only, until they find a replacement. Not a minute longer.”
On Monday morning, he reluctantly pulled the yellow mini van out of the district yard. He was glad the other drivers had already gone. It was down right embarrassing. Six seats. Six pitiful seats! No way, thank you very much.
Later that morning, he eased the van to the curb on the last pickup. A little girl slowly climbed aboard. Her chin trembled and he saw eyes bright with unshed tears. She waved a brave good bye to her mother. Then as she turned toward him, she placed a small trembling hand on his arm and said softly, “Hi, bus.”

“Don’t worry, the rain is coming”

By

Gerry Niskern

(This column from the Arizona Republic seems appropriate again!)

It’s late this year, and worrisome. We usually have a first big storm by the Fourth of July. But, relax, it’s coming, and it always comes with a bang! Here are some memories of past wet summers. Enjoy.
One day, years ago it was raining so hard I could hardly see them out on the sidewalk. One toddler ran by, laughing, the feet of his soggy sleepers slapping the pavement. Baby brother came into sight; his drenched diaper, laden with rainwater, dragging behind. Big sister in pink pajamas led the parade of upturned, wet faces squealing with the joy at the rain that had finally come after a long period of despair.
That year, in the late l950s’, the residents here in the valley had waited months for relief from the drought. On the days my children ran outside barefooted the pavement was scalding. The dry grass stubble was prickly and so were tempers. Respite came, as always, sometime in July.
We have had years of drought and years of unbelievable rains. That summer, before the rains came, the huge dust storms, the weathermen now call them Haboobs, left an inch layer of dirt on the bottom of everyone’s pool. The kids begged to swim, so I became an expert at pool vacuuming…every single morning!
The thunderstorms that sometimes come tearing thru the valley create havoc, but just manage to give everyone’s grass a good soaking. It’s hard to believe, but sometimes we do get too much precipitation.
Years ago, in the l940’s when I was a kid, the rain finally came and drenched the parched ground, but didn’t stop. The Cave Creek Dam finally broke. The railroad tracks along Nineteenth Ave dammed the water. The residential area around the Arizona State Capitol building had heavy flooding. We kids, in the blissful ignorance of childhood, just enjoyed riding our bikes through the knee high water flowing curb to curb in the streets. We didn’t realize that most of the businesses were sandbagged and the Capitol basement had flooded.
We were even treated to our first look at an U. S. Army amphibious vehicle. The Seventeenth Avenue underpass was flooded too and the kids all watched in awe as a group of soldiers came down the street and drove right through the deep water.
I’ll never forget my dad returning from hiking alone on South Mountain. He was caught in a downpour so hard that he said, “I couldn’t see or breathe. I was really beginning to panic!”
I remember a neighbor at that time telling my folks, “Back in l938, the Salt River really overflowed its banks. The Central Avenue Bridge was holding the water back and all of central Phoenix was in danger of being flooded. Just as they were ready to light the fuse to dynamite the bridge, the water started to subside.”
One other summer, when my kids were in their teens, around 1970, we lived in a different neighborhood and the rains were again unrelenting. The ground was saturated and one Saturday morning police drove through the area shouting on loud speakers, “Attention, Prepare to evacuate!” Arizona Canal just North a few blocks of us was starting to overflow its banks
The rains this summer won’t end the drought, only heavy winter snows do that; but as always, they will surely nourish our spirits.
Meanwhile, the scent of wet creosote bushes on the mountain above me, mixed with the pungent smell of desert grass below will be like heaven as I watch the rabbits and quail scurrying for shelter from the rain that is sure to come soon.

Accidental Birder
By
Gerry Niskern
“A bird does not sing because it has an answer,
It sings because it has a song”…..Maya Angelou

I woke up the other morning to find my rock covered back yard totally darkened with tiny, Finch- sized black birds. The massive flock was a sea of black bobbing heads as they feasted on something deep among the rocks. The back fence was lined with more of the small birds waiting their turn at this breakfast buffet. I have no idea what the attraction was; nothing like that feeding frenzy had ever happened before. My grandson suggested it might have been ants.
My number 1 son has often pointed out some interesting birds in his neighborhood and now I had a story to tell him!
I’ve never been a bird watcher, but I started recalling some special memories of birds that I have seen here in Arizona.
Once on a drive with my dad when I was a kid we rounded a sharp curve on a dusty desert road just as a hawk with a snake in it’s beak flew up out of some bushes and over the hood of our car. The startled hawk dropped his reptile lunch on the hood of our car. The lucky snake got a reprieve and we had a great story to tell our friends.
Another precious memory is of being able to look down from our balcony into a tiny hummingbird nest in a tall Hibiscus bush below. I was able to watch those tiny blue eggs in their nests every year without disturbing the mama birds.
Living at the base of the North Phoenix Mountains, I sometimes had the thrill of seeing the shadow of the huge wings of an owl overhead at dusk as it swooped down on a prey while I was sitting out on our balcony.
Because of our very wet winter here in our Sonoran desert, nature has provided the birds with a bountiful supply of food. Just in my yard alone the Saguaro and it’s cousin the Organ Pipe have outdone themselves. The Saguaro had creamy, white blossoms, even on it’s one tiny arm. The birds love the nectar and of course, the bats visit and pollinate at night.
The Organ Pipe stands at highest arm about l2 feet, with many branches. Starting in May and all of June it was a something to behold. Each morning I opened my front blinds to a unique gathering of birds feasting on the red fruit that the Organ Pipe produced. Everyone seemed to have a “seat at the table”. Both small and large friends were perched up and down the cactus branches. White-winged doves, Cactus wrens, even pigeons came to the banquet. No one could be bothered to stop eating and chase a newcomer away!
I’ve never paid a lot of attention to our bird population, but once I stopped and actually looked at the many species this spring, I’ve become fascinated. Most fly, but some travel only on the ground like the quail and roadrunners. I wonder if they even know that they are missing the “Pitaya Dulce”(sweet cactus). It’s been said to be better than watermelon.
When I go out front to sit in the evening (not right now!) I hear beautiful bird songs; and a few a little screechy. I wonder sometimes if the tiny mama bird that peers down at me from her nest in the hole in the Saguaro agrees with me.
There is estimated to be around 47 million official birders in the United States.
Actually, there is 47 million and one!

“Did Anyone Ask the Kids?”

By

Gerry Niskern

When politicians are running for office, it’s “all about the children” in every campaign speech. But guess what, those concerns are forgotten when it comes to budget cutting time.
I was dumbfounded when it was announced last year that the city budget for the coming year would include cutting back on the number of days the City of Phoenix public swimming pools would be open, I couldn’t believe it; not in the heat of this city.
After all, Maricopa County boasts more than 126,000 millionaires. When our city officials travel worldwide touting Phoenix, the fifth largest city in the United States, do they mention that we can’t afford to keep our public pools open for the entire summer? Surely, I thought, someone will remember how hot it is here in August, and revise their thinking about an early shutdown. It’s still hot and hundreds of kids still need a place to swim.
This year the lack of life guards was one problem. Perhaps if the wages were comparable to other essential city jobs there would be plenty of applicants.
Who can forget the feeling, growing up here in Phoenix, of arriving hot and tired at the counter of the public pool, paying your admission, getting a safety pin with a number and a basket for your clothes and finally jumping feet first into that deliciously cold water? It was heaven. Wherever you learned to swim as a kid, canal, river lake or pool, I’ll bet you’ve never forgotten the delight of that day.
Times have changed and thousands of children have the benefit of a pool in their own back yard. Then again, thousands of kids don’t even have a back yard, let along a swimming pool. Many parents of kids who use the public pools work hard at two minimum wage jobs. They manage to scrape together enough each day for the kids to get to swim. For many that is their only recreation all summer.
Let’s ask our representatives to think about those idle pools on their way home each day to cool off a bit in their pool with the family before dinner. And then when it comes to the budget for next year, sharpen their pencils for cuts in other areas besides on the backs of kids.
After all, did anyone ask the kids? Oh, that’s right. Kids don’t vote!

Color moods
By
Gerry Niskern
Have you been to the Dr. lately? Depressing, isn’t it?
I don’t mean your reason for going, of course, I’m referring to the monochromatic colors used in most of the waiting rooms everywhere. The shades of grey on the walls and the grey plank floors are not what you would like to see when you are feeling down, worried or depressed already.
I’m convinced there was a conference of office designers somewhere a few years ago and the outcome was a pledge to use only greys, blacks, a little white in all medical places. And then, of course, the wall décor must be silver or chrome art wall sculptures that have no redeeming features whatsoever.
Of course, when they call you into an examining room, you see that the walls do have some pictures to break the monotony . But wait, when you get closer it turns out to be a giant image of the human reproductive system, or worse, the digestion tract in living color!
For several years I went to a dermatologist who had quilting as a hobby. She was a wonderful doctor who also believed in sharing her beautiful quilts with her patients. They adorned the waiting room and even hung in the exam rooms. (master of tiny stitches!)
I remember actually being introduced to watercolor painting by another doctor who believed that his patients deserved to enjoy something beautiful, colorful and original. I was fascinated by the paintings on his walls. The images were so alive, ethereal and inspiring. They drew me into the painting world and eventually the art profession.
Another Asian dentist had original watercolors installed in every room. Visits to the dentist are never pleasant, but those paintings were unique. They were done by a fellow Asian, well known here in the valley, and a welcome distraction to his many patients.
I confess I don’t know how Pediatrician’s office décor is, I hope there is vibrant color and interesting images everywhere. Phoenix children’s hospital for example, does a fabulous job.
I’ll admit I haven’t accepted the idea of a monochromatic world that seems to be widely accepted everywhere, in our homes, in the miles of grey or tan homes or apartments. I think kids should grow up in homes with color on the walls and interesting art. Landscapes, portraits, and good abstracts can trigger a response that will lead in a thousand directions.
Hopefully, someday this monochromatic trend in décor will fall out of favor and some color will come flooding back to help change and lighten our moods.