“For the win”

By

Gerry Niskern

Have you ever woke up because you sensed that someone was staring at you? I opened my eyes to  a little pair of eyes staring down at me.

“Hey, Grandma Gerry. ‘member that game?” he whispered quietly. I looked at the clock. It was five A. M. and the sun wasn’t even up!

On that morning many years ago, that three year old  little grandson was anxious to play a board game that I had introduced to him the evening before.  I think it was called Hi Ho CherryO.

Games at Christmas; the most fun of all. Sure Video games are great,  but right now I’m thinking of all the games I would like to play with my three year old Great-Great Grandaughter. She’s the granddaughter of that little boy who woke me many years ago.

She lives in another town, but I know she would love Old Maid, Go Fish, Slap Jack, Crazy Eights, Chutes and Ladders, CandyLand and I could go on  and on. And she would be good at them too!

Sure, everyone says “Christmas is for the kids”, but I think it’s for the Grandparents too. I look forward to the time when dinner is over, all the presents have been opened and we can get down to the important business of the day; the game. A game that all ages can play together. Trivia, Smart Ass, and Guesstures (a version of Charades) are a few that our family loved

That grandson who woke me up years ago to play will get another game from me this year as usual and so will his little granddaughter..

What was your favorite Christmas present?

By

Gerry Niskern

Can you think of the favorite Christmas present that you received in your whole lifetime?

Of course, all of Santa’s surprises were wonderful when you were a kid. I remember rushing down on Christmas morning and finding toys under the tree. Nothing was wrapped. They were just there, right where Santa dropped them!

Then as I got older I became more aware of the true spirit of giving gifts to loved ones at Christmas. In my teens I couldn’t wait  to exchange gifts with my girl/boy friends. Then it happened. That special boy gave me a small beautifully wrapped package. Inside was heart shaped locket made of gold and embellished with rose gold. It opened, and inside on either side was a space for two tiny photos.

Years later, at Christmas, my new groom, the Locket Guy, brought a large box home. He shut the bedroom door and tried to quietly wrap the contents of the box. When I heard something clanging and banging on the hardwood floor, I immediately thought, “If he bought me a vacuum cleaner, like some HOUSEWIFE, I’ll kill him!”

On Christmas morning, when  I opened his gift to me I  found a tiny FeatherWeight sewing machine. I loved it.

Other totally surprising and thoughtful gifts come to mind. : a beautiful silver coffee/tea set for my ladies group meetings, a luxurious Aqua blue gown and robe that he let the kids pick out on their own, Best of all, right after baby number three was born he brought home the latest kitchen item, a portable dishwasher. This tired young mother felt like she had a maid!

Years later, when they first came out, he surprised me with a microwave. I was not happy! I had read too many stories by all the skeptics that they were dangerous and could cause all kinds of health problems. Now, think about it.  What would we do without our Microwaves?

Finally, he settled into the tradition of a generous gift card from Barnes and Noble that warmed the heart of this “Book Worm” wife.

So, what was your favorite Christmas gift that you ever received? If I had to choose, I know that I will always treasure the gold heart locket with our tiny  photos inside, but I think  the portable dishwasher won, hands down!

Is it worthwhile?

By

Gerry Niskern

“There’ll be blue birds over, the white cliffs of Dover,

Tomorrow, when the world is free.”

That’s the song that pops into my mind every time I hear someone complaining about wearing a mask during this terrible pandemic. I was a child during WWll and we sang that song a lot while we collected scrap metal and old tires to be converted  for the war effort. We saved our pennies and bought savings stamps to paste into a book to help us exchange  it later for a War Bond.

Our mothers saved their fat drippings in jars and turned them in to help make explosives for the war. Everything was rationed. Ration books were issued to each family to allow us to buy shoes, gasoline, meat, and sugar. There was absolutely no candy for kids to buy.

We stood in line  at the grocery every Saturday morning, waiting for our mothers to come later and take our place and be first at the meat counter. Meat came in once a week and if she was lucky she could get a roast and maybe some bacon.

Besides all the creature comforts and essentials we gave up, many gave up sons, brothers and fathers.

Very few of the 330 milllion Americans living through Covid-19 can remember the time when the country was asked to make sacrifices for the greater good of their fellow citizens. The people of the United States made those sacrifices willingly to preserve our freedom back then and they made a history to be proud of. The personal freedom that people refer to defiantly when refusing to wear a mask was won many years ago.  and now needs to be achieved by beating this Covid-19.

Sure, today we have been asked to put our lives on pause in a number of ways. We’ve been on this journey for ten months now. We have been asked to wear masks, social distance and avoid large gatherings. It’s not much to ask.

All of those things we give up are not leaving the planet! They will all be here next year. Birthdays, weddings, graduations, Thanksgiving dinner and Christmas parties will take place again.  Remind the people you hear complaining that we are in for the fight of our lives and we can make history again.

Maybe what we need this time is another song.

“There’ll be love and laughter, and peace ever after, tomorrow when the world is free”

“Visiting My Dishes”

By

Gerry Niskern

I had lunch at my bachelor son’s house the other and had a pleasant surprise when he served it on my dishes. Like all families we passed dishes on to the kids when they got their own place.

I started thinking about it, and really I started passing what I’ll call “Family Heirlooms” a long time ago. It was fun to see family members using them. Why wait until  I was gone? A long time ago I decided I wanted to know who would cherish and actually use treasured items of mine.

At a family birthday party last year it was a pleasure to watch my granddaughter serve the cake on my dessert plates, while the cake crowned my cake stand. The best thing about giving this granddaughter heirlooms is that she treasures old things and her daughter will learn to also.

The handmade quilt that I had as a child and actually had helped poke the needles up thru from under the quilting frame while my mother and her friends worked on it, will be in good hands. The story that goes with it will be passed along. The stories are valued as much as the items.

My other granddaughter lives in Alaska so it is a little harder to add to her household, but I did manage to carefully wrap and send an exquisite glass plate that my grandmother brought with her when she came to America in the l880’s. A difficult feat when you are traveling Steerage. I treasured it and I know she will too. It was her great great grandmothers!

A small unique Cedar chest is waiting at my great grandsons house for his daughter, with its sweet, scripted story inside.

Families have always passed down dishes, crystal, jewelry, furniture. It’s a wonderful tradition. And the best part is it doesn’t matter what your financial circumstances are, you always have the ability to give something you loved to someone younger and then sit back and watch them enjoy it.

When I was sixteen and visiting my Aunt Ann she insisted on giving me one of her ceramic serving bowls. At the time I really wasn’t interested in having it, but now it is one of my cherished possessions. When I see it I think of the good times we had in her house.

Start passing along some of your treasures. L promise it will bring you happiness

I haven’t posted a blog for a while. I couldn’t  really compete with the interesting and important writing taking place.

We had an election!

Many wise scribes wrote about the work that had to be done to reunite our country. Sure there are important issues for our new government to work on: building new alliances here and abroad.

But getting down to the nitty-gritty of what everyday citizens can do to build peace and harmony, it all starts at home. Sometimes we all don’t realize the smallest words or actions are repeated by our children and grandchildren.

Try this little exercise in communication to relax boundaries and bring everyone into the same fold, free from discrimination  and prejudice. When someone asks if you have a cleaning lady, say “yes, her name is (fill in the blank), instead of saying,

“yes, I have a Mexican/”

Instead of saying,”I’m going over to Home Depot to get a Mexican to do the yard, How about announcing, “I’m going over to hire a guy at Home Depot to help me?

It’s easy to drop the descriptive ethnic title and just call them “my friend”. Try it. And remember the young ones are listening and will imitate your actiions. Before you know it some of those new “friends” may actually become friends.

I’m sure, like me, you all have had many friends in your lifetime. They come in all ages, shapes, and sizes. A friend is a person you meet who likes you for what you are, not what you have done. Somehow, they see beneath your outside shell to the real you. And they like you anyway!

Let’s start building a community of friends who have no other descriptive title except “Friend”.

TEN DAYS AND COUNTING

By

Gerry Niskern

I remember interviewing this lady from Glendale when I was writing my
On this corner” series for the Republic about old landmarks around the valley.

Mary White Renner, age 83, is a lifetime resident of Glendale. Although Renner has traveled to many countries over the years, she values the wonderful memories of growing up in a small town. ”

The one location that Renner fondly called the “heart” of the community was Murphy Park, on Glendale Ave.  “The only structure in the park was the gazebo. When an election was coming up, the political rallies were held there. To us, this was a big event. Everybody knew everyone. The band was playing and families from all around the area brought blankets and spread out their picnics on the grass. The adults gathered around the gazebo, festooned in red, white and blue and listened to the opposing speakers, while we kids played. I remember it was a amiable atmosphere, no rancor or feeling of neighbor against neighbor.”

That gazebo is gone now.

So is the democratic spirit our country has always tried to maintain during elections, big and small. The kids today have heard all kinds of accusations and name calling. What they haven’t heard about is Syria, human rights, drones, inequality, the WHO, NATO, the United Nations. Little was said about the millions of displaced persons living in squalid camps for years. Our important alliances that work with us to try to solve the world’s most urgent problems was rarely mentioned.

Sure, we wll  all be relieved when the election is over, however long it takes. But we need to be thinking now about healing the spirit of our communities; getting together with that friend or neighbor who maybe didn’t lean the same way as you politically. Reach out to renew old friendships that have become frayed by the winds of angry rhetoric.

Maybe that old gazebo is gone now, but hopefully that spirit of democracy is still out there waiting to be recaptured.

“Political food fights”

By

Gerry Niskern

Have you heard the old saying, you are what you eat? Well, there’s a new slogan in today’s political climate which is, “What you eat is how you vote.” By tracking the foods you prefer the political campaign strategists are able to pursue your vote.

As crazy as it seems, all the candidates pay consulting firms big money to track your purchases and try to put you into a targeted group to ask for your vote.

According to a recent article in the New York Times by Kim Severson, ‘the political advisors to the presidential candidates are looking closely at how people eat as a way to scavenge more votes.’

By practicing microtargeting political strategists can study our food preferences and predict our politics. They can avoid “one size fits all” mailings, e-mails or phone calls if they can target small groups gleaned from their research.

For example, Dr. Pepper is largely a Republic drink. Pepsi and Sprite are Democratic. So are most clear Liquors, like white wine and Evian water. Republicans lean towards brown liquors like bourbon, red wine or Fiji water. Democrats tend to order earthier, down-home foods. However, here’s where the strategists get into trouble.

Many Democratic voters are trying to make ends meet. They are doing more cooking at home. They don’t eat out at expensive restaurants. However, the Republican affluent “stay-at-home” moms are now back into cooking comfort foods on stoves the size of Volkswagons. Confusing, isn’t it?

There is the one crowd of voters who still believe in old fashioned birthday parties with pizza, ice cream and cake. And then there’s the crowd who serve veggie burgers, papaya gelato and flourless cake. Guess which is which?

How about the voters who enjoy their iced tea year round? It’s syrupy sweet for the Southern Republicans. But wait a minute; the Western Democrats love their plain China Mist. How do the strategists sort them out?

My husband had a good friend who like himself was from West Texas. They grew up on pinto beans and cornbread. They met as adults, but agreed on the fact that the only way to eat cornbread was crumbled up into a glass of milk. And guess what, one was a “dyed in the wool” Republican and the other was a staunch Democrat!

“Carefree Creeks”

By

Gerry Niskern

Do you have memories of playing in the creek (or should I say crick) as a child? If you do, you are truly blessed.

When I was a kid my sister and I fixed something to eat to take with us and started down through the meadow below our house most days in the summertime. I don’t remember the name of the creek that was our destination, or if it even had one, but it was our haven. We played in the water, built dams, skipped rocks, built little boat to sail in the slow current, and even tried to catch some minnows.

On weekends we piled into the car for long rides that always ended up at a stream for dad to do some fishing. I think that one was called Big Grave Creek. We usually wore our bathing  suits because we knew there would usually be a deep pool of water for swimming. I don’t know why we had to go that way, but I remember Dad saying, “Hold on kids, were’ turning on Salley’s Back Bone!” That was the title of the rockiest, bumpiest dirt road in the state and well named.

Later on, in Fourth grade on the last day of school, and we got out at noon, I had the most fun ever at Little Grave Creek. The fourth and fifth grade was together and we kids all agreed to meet at the creek (I don’t know why it was called Little Grave because it was big enough for swimming.) We gathered at the creek with our sandwiches and bottles of pop and stayed all afternoon swimming and whooping  at our summer of freedom starting! No parents, planning or permission slips required.

When we moved to Arizona Dad always insisted on driving up to Oak Creek to be there on the first day of Trout season. This required driving up to the canyon the night before and sleeping in the car to be the first on the stream at the crack of dawn on opening day!

A couple of years later when I was a teen I spend a wonderful week at a Methodist Church Camp at Seven Springs. No fancy dorms or even tents, just sleeping out under the stars in sleeping bags listening the sweet murmur of the brook.

Years later we took our young ones to Red Rock Crossing, South of Sedona on Oak  Creek. The kids, with inner tubes around them, scrambled over the red rock formations and jumped into the rapids for a thrilling ride down the water, again and again. When they were tired out at the end of the day and the campfire had burned low, we zipped the tent full of sleeping kids and stole down to the deep pool below the crossing and went skinny-dipping!

Do you have some sparkling streams  in your memories? I hope so.

INTERLUDE FROM COVID

By

Gerry  Niskern

The misters were sending their heavenly cool spray over the coffee area as I emerged from my favorite market.

After “sheltering in” for eight months, (yes, I started in February!), I realized I was way behind on my People Watching. I checked my mask and decided to find a seat far away from everyone, out of the traffic pattern. Of course People Watching involves speculating!

I’m happy to report absolute everyone was wearing a mask. (except for a couple I’ll tell you about later).It was fun to watch the toddlers wearing their teeny, tiny masks trying to catch hold of a pigeon. Pigeons, one million, toddlers zero.

Even though I wasn’t mingling, it did my heart good to be in an area that felt social to me. I watched as four Senior ladies at  a table talked “fifty miles an hour ”.Masks didn’t slow down the gossip one little bit.

The mix of people is amazing. The office girls and “ladies who lunch” were still entertaining with their latest fashion review still on display. And by the way, could the young girls cut their jeans off any shorter? Their cheeks are already flashing as they walk away with their special lattes.

Of course, the little dogs are still raising a racket challenging the big canines.

The couple without masks were not eating or drinking. Just talking for an hour. The guy with salt and pepper hair and a paunch was way too  incredibly happy and excited to hear every word his companion was telling him. She had six inch heels, a thigh high off the shoulder dress and long hair. Trust me, not his wife!

One guy left on his State of the Art bike with his  sandwich and a bottle of beer. Hmmmm….Would that be called drinking while driving?

The maskless couple finally left in separate cars parked nearby after some long, passionate kisses. Definitely not his wife!

It used to be fun to watch the  social dynamics of the high school kids, but that will have to wait for a while. When I heard the first wave of them approaching, I was OUT OF THERE!

Swing State!

By

Gerry Niskern

When our family moved to Phoenix in l942 and an election as coming up, my mother went over to the Arizona State Capitol. The voting and registration was set up in the rotunda of the capitol My mom said she was a Republican an wanted to register and vote. . At that time Arizona was overwhelmingly Democrat and had been for a long time; and all the election  workers were too. They hooted and hollered. “Here’s a Republican. She wants to register.” They directed her to the far end of the area and she walked down quickly amid a lot of laughing and teasing. I remember her telling the family later how embarrassed she was.

Just think, it’s now full speed ahead for the presidential election with a few weeks to go. I don’t know if I can take much more election grind with all the debates and constant challenges from friends and even total strangers.   .

The trouble with allowing political discourse is that people always think that the other person is mistaken and if they will just listen they can convince them to change their minds.

Do you sometimes suspect that political junkies want to show off their newfound knowledge on a particular issue? Hence, the aggressive questioning of others political persuasion has become the norm today.  Sure politics makes for exciting conversation. But, we all need to observe some civility and restraint.

I know a hair stylist friend who is shocked these days by the number of people who plop down in her chair and demand to know, “Well, what are you, Republican or Democrat?”  Everyone needs to remember that others may also be up on the issues and have strong personal opinions.  And that should be their right and privilege to keep their decision private.

Sure we are subject to hateful, derogatory images and dialogue on social media, but that and usually the source, can be easily deleted. Face to face confrontations are another story.

We all realize and dislike how polarized this country has become in the last several years. Let’s don’t take it a step further and become even more polarized within our parties and among our friends and even family. .

Sure we’ll all remember this year of 2020 as an unusual campaign with the excitement  and antagonism seldom seen in recent decades, but let’s lower the temperature..  Friendships weave the strong fabric of our community and nation, but lets also keep in mind the thread of friendship and family is precious and fragile.